DSi XL: Almost There…

The Nintendo DS series of hand-held gaming systems have seemed to live right on the cusp of something great, but never quite getting there. With the newest entry, gamers can find satisfaction, and the rest of us are still waiting on the software to support it. How many times do we have to revisit this touch screen only to wonder where the productivity applications are? How many times do we have to ask ourselves how neat it would be to have our address book stored on this thing? Seriously, how many different ways can we see great potential only to get a full plate of mediocrity? Yes, it is time for the mysterious Bandito to make his re-appearance to predict the many different ways that the new Nintendo DSi XL should be used, but won’t be. — Editor

The Bandito sends his many greetings to all readers. Hello to all. The Bandito is here, and this time I, the Bandito himself, am angry with Nintendo‘s lack of CajoNES. Is the big “N” so scared of fruit that they just cannot release a single useful application for the touch screen marvel they created? Okay, they have a downloadable notepad, ooh. The Bandito is not impressed! The Bandito wants real application. The Bandito wants flash in that browser. The Bandito can play snazzy games on the Fruit’s iPhone, so the Bandito must have a phone on the DSi XL. Is this so difficult for Nintendo to understand? The Bandito can play hangman on paper. The Bandito can play hangman on Nintendo DSi XL. The Bandito thinks that DSi XL should compare to competition not number two pencil.

The Fruit and other phone makers do not have a court order stating that address books cannot be shared with other devices; otherwise, The Bandito would not have this thing called a PDA. The Bandito is not asking for some USB connector, but there is other uses for that SD card than just photos, no? Such a small thing this shared address book, and so useful too. Yes, Bandito understands little Johnny may not stop playing Pokemon Salmon Half Bright Color long enough for the use of this software, but Bandito beats his Amazonian children; thus, is no problem for The Stupendous Bandito. Speaking of beatings, The Bandito believes that such an application could hinder the Fruit’s encroachment of the gaming market. Why is this so wonderful? Because The Great and Wonderful Bandito says so, of course!

The Bandito sees all the unused memory. The Bandito sees the storage capacity of SD cards growing. The Bandito sees the DSi screens growing. Should not Bandito also see productivity software growing also? The Sony PSP has Skype, but has not the camera. The Bandito wonders why the DSi and DSi XL have not the Skype; they have the camera. Make phone calls from the McDonald’s free internet connection; save on Bandito’s minutes. The Bandito knows he is wishing for gold at the end of the Rainbow. Just like Lars wishes Bandito couldn’t record his visit to Metallica concerts, like the DSi should make possible. Bandito know that none of the following are coming, but the Great Bandito also knows that they should all be done!

The Bandito List ‘O Stuff

  • Flash for the Browser
  • Include Notepad freely
  • Address book
  • Skype
  • Video Streaming
  • RTF
  • Appointment Calendar
  • Can Opener
  • File Manager
  • Email Client

The Bandito knows that not all of these things will be done. Some may not even be possible. Still, the Bandito knows that these applications will make Nintendo‘s hand-held a better, and more useful, gadget. The Bandito must go now. The Great Bandito has Amazonian children that must receive their beatings, so until next time… The Bandito bids all a farewell!


The Editor does not support the wild claims of Bandito, nor does the editor support the making of, rearing of, or beating of Amazonian Children.